Alam Na.

Sa buong buhay ko, ikaw lang ang ginusto - hindi, minahal - ko ng ganito.

Sabi nila pera mo lang daw ang habol ko. Siguro nga. Pero alam ko naman sa sarili ko na ang totoong dahilan kung bakit ginusto kita ay dahil binigyan mo ako ng direksyon sa buhay. Hindi ako natakot sa pwedeng mangyari sa hinaharap dahil alam ko na magkasama tayo at hindi mo ako pababayaan. Akala ko talaga tayo na hanggang sa huli, pero ayun nga, hindi pala.

Ngayon sinusubukan kong maghanap ng katulad mo, pero habang tumatagal lalo lang akong nakukumbinsi na wala na akong makikita pa na tatalo sayo. E ano naman ngayon kung hindi ikaw ang pinakamagaling. Ikaw pa rin ang pinakamagandang bagay na nangyari sa buhay ko, at habang-buhay kong pagsisisihan na pinakawalan kita.

Hindi ko na mababalik ang oras para itama ang mga mali ko. Pero kahit ano ang mangyari, sana alam mo na sayo parin ang puso ko, at wala na akong mamahalin pa katulad ng pagmamahal ko sayo.

To Fat Kid :P



This is my sister. She has been Dei-Dei or Dei to us forever, but lately I've been calling her Fat Kid because she now weighs the heaviest in my family. :P


We look nothing alike and rarely share similar tastes but we get along really well. We do a lot of stuff together and enjoy spending time with each other.


No matter what happens we always have each other's backs because that's what sisters who are also best friends do. ^_^


I don't remember asking God for a sister but on this day nineteen years ago He gave me one anyway. I guess it just goes to show that God knows what's best for all of us. ^_^

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FAT KID!

Not Another Emo Post

Because I’m no longer working (for now) I finally have some free time again and because I’m done with watching Supernatural Seasons 1-6, Two and a Half Men Seasons 1-7, Burn Notice Seasons 1-3, Leverage Seasons 1-3, 6 CD’s worth of documentaries about lions and 1 GB worth of DotA replays (I’m not kidding) I decided to post another blog entry even though I just posted one yesterday. :P

This one was supposed to be titled ‘It’s Gonna Hurt Bad Before It Gets Better’ after Keith Urban’s Tonight I Wanna Cry (Chris Richardson has a really awesome version too! ^_^) but I decided that I don’t want it to sound too emo. So yeah…

1. Hurting Bad: BSP, BDO, Chinabank, Deutsche Bank, Nielsen, Reuters, Nissin, Ayala Land, Seaoil. Like if all these were job offers I’d be extremely happy, but they’re just interviews and interviews don’t get people paid. (Seaoil question during the interview: Are you willing to be a pump attendant? @_@)

Getting Better: Er I dunno. I had an ECG last week for those supposedly stress-related chest pains I was having when I was still with BPI. Thing is, they still happen even now that I’m no longer with BPI. I think I’m more stressed now because I am UNEMPLOYED.

2. Hurting Bad: I know I’ve been telling people that I’m okay now and all and really, I am compared to the mess that I was a week ago. But I won’t deny the fact that there are still times when out of the blue I feel so sad and sometimes I even cry. What can I say, turns out I love BPI more than I thought I did.

Getting Better: Well I just think that I still have my Uno Trenta friends even though I am technically no longer part of Uno Trenta. And even though I miss getting paid a fat salary every two weeks, it’s not as if I’m gonna be hungry or go homeless if I stay unemployed for, say, the next two months.

3. Hurting Bad: GGnet (yes, I support GGnet) does not even win one match in The International, MYM disbands because apparently DotA is not part of some of its players’ ‘real lives’ (Dude, you’re professional DotA players who get paid to play, DotA IS your REAL LIFE) and now 820, who has been called god of Lina retires from playing for EHOME so he could coach World Elite with 2009. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Getting Better: For GGnet, no unless they pick up what came out of MYM. For MYM, they’re getting Scythe SG to play under their banner and hats off to Scythe SG (but lets face it, MYM.RaZeR followed by any other words other than ‘Maelk (Captain)’ is not MYM at all.) For EHOME, I will watch you as long as 357 continues to play Lina.

The only real good news is Vigoss being with m5, but m5 just got disqualified from HFGL for being pasaway so its not exactly good news, eh?

4. Hurting Bad: The pro DotA circle is a mess and my own DotA circle isn’t any better. Guys, I just wanted to play a fun game once again and maybe show you a bit of things I’ve picked up after watching replay after replay after replay of m5.vigoss, m5.Dread, EH.GIGABYTE.820, EH.GIGABYTE.357, LGD.benz.SGTY, aka all the guys who consistently use Lina. Is that so hard?

Getting Better: So to the guy who likes to shout ‘Push, mga Kapuso, push!’ and the guy who likes to sing ‘Puck the magic dragon’ in-game… you know what I wanna say. Please keep the fists away and let’s just have more fun games like the old times. I promise not to KS so much now.

5. Hurting Bad: Demian Maia loses decision to Mark Munoz and Dan Hardy hits 4th straight loss after a submission courtesy of Lights Out Lytle. What is happening to my favourite fighters? Are we cursed altogether? Again, whyyyyyyyyyyy?

Getting Better: Well at least Maia is still in the middleweight chart and UFC didn’t fire Hardy. Just please don’t tell me that GSP will lose to Carlos Condit because I will die.

So yeah, that about wraps it up. Wish me and my heroes luck, friends, because as Kuroky said, “I really need it right now.”

Weirdest/Funniest/MostAmazing/MostFulfilling Thing Ever

So this morning I was at the train station waiting for a train (syempre alangan namang maghintay ako ng barko sa MRT) and this girl beside me was surfing the net with her phone and guess what, she was reading something that Jin (well in real life, I) wrote! It was the weirdest, funniest, most amazing, most fulfilling thing ever. ^_^ I like wanted to 'kalbit' (how do you say that in English? Poke sounds wrong.) her and say "Hey, it's me Jin, I wrote that!" but I restrained myself because that would be too weird, even for me.

Anyway I checked my mail today and there's a new comment and the flag in the sender's account is the Philippines so I'm assuming its her. I sent a reply saying I think I saw her at the MRT this morning. Let's see what she replies! ^_^

:')

Third day out of BPI.
Second day of counseling with mum's psychologist.
First day I didn't cry one single time in twelve hours.

Someday...someday...